People pleasing is a trauma-based behavior that causes one to tend to someone’s needs at the expense of their own. People pleasing also goes beyond simply agreeing with someone or helping out of goodwill. Instead, people pleasers act out of fear of rejected by the other person. Pleasing the needs of others becomes their definition of love. While pleasing others may satisfy the people pleaser’s immediate needs, this comes at the cost of confidence, identity, and happiness.

Fortunately, people pleasing behaviors aren’t permanent and Pye and Dr. Glen lay out where this behavior stems from in order to begin making effective change, setting boundaries, and putting your own needs first.

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